Seattle… we need to talk.
I know you’re busy, but yes, now.
No, I’m sorry, it can’t wait.
Not any longer, not any more.
The fact is, I knew this conversation would be hard and that’s why I’ve put it off for so long.
I’ve… I’ve been having these feelings for quite a while.
They’re not new to me, and I don’t think they are, but maybe they are, maybe they’re new to you?
I feel like for a long time, for the longest time, I’ve been trying to tell you – exactly in that indirect style of communication you seem to hold so dear.
Again and again, I drop hints, subtle and not.
Think about it.
You know it’s the truth.
You’ve felt the animosity.
I know you have, you have to have!
We both know I’ve been uncomfortably overt at times.
So this is it.
Change is the one constant in life, right?
People and places changing perpetually?
Evolving and devolving all the time?
By the day?
By the month?
By the year?
By years long spans?
By nine year long spans?
By OUR nine year long span?!?
I fell so hard for you when we met, you know that, right?
I usually try to play it cool when I fall in love.
But no way, no how, not that first time I gazed up at your endless beauty – magnificent swaths of gigantic trees creating these flowing green spaces that contrasted the stunning blue bodies of water along with jagged white capped mountains and volcanoes.
You, with your craftsmen, your bungalows, your houseboats, nestled in the middle of it all like a little urban summer camp oasis retreat.
But it wasn’t just your looks.
I’ve never been that shallow and I still contend that I am not.
What got me, what really got me, what really got me and gave me that hook?
That funky, quirky, gotta-get-to-know-ya personality you projected.
A little bit isolationist, a little bit old west frontier spirit and a little bit of can-do pride.
Your love of and adherence to the principles of process, politesse and discussion.
Maybe that’s still you.
Maybe it’s not.
Maybe you’re exactly the same and it’s me or my perceptions that have changed.
It’s always easier to pass the blame.
Well, listen, any way we break it down, who am I to try and limit you, define you, keep you in this box of an idea that exists forever as a still from the movie of a memory in my mind?
And who are you to do the same to me?
I’m no one but myself and I’m certainly not the whole of you and I can’t really change you any more than you can really change me.
But let it be your duty and let it be mine, let’s always remember those glorious intersections of space and time we were privileged to spend together in the past.
It’s part of you and it’s part of me.
No disagreement or separation will ever change our shared history, that we HAVE shared history and how that shared history helped make me me and helped make you you and how we were both along for the ride and what a hell of a ride it was.
But that’s it right there.
History. The past. Was. Were.
Where despite conflicted love, the crux of our story together will forever reside.
I’m leaving you.